CatholicPhoenix.com

I'm posting every couple of weeks at a great new, local Catholic blog called Catholic Phoenix. Here's a link to my latest post.

Happy Fother's Day

Below is a scan of the "Fother's Day" card Francesca gave to my grandfather (her Grand Pepere). How would you like to get a card like this one?

Everybody (except my grandfather and Francesca) thought this was hilarious.

Poor girl, she was just trying to be sweet.

Olivia Publishes Her first Book

The title of Olivia's new book is Sophia and Joseph Get a Whole Can, but Olivia Gets a Half Cup by Olivia Drapeau.

I think it's brilliant.

Robertus, Episcopus, et Confirmandus

Sometimes when I'm out visiting my public, random prelates jump in for a quick photo-op...

Pollywog in a Bog

My kids' new favorite song, from one of my favorite bands.

What's Wrong With the World

h/t my buddy Scorrahood

Theology of the Bawdy: Amy, Will You Let Me

Here's a little salt to go with the sweet of the last post...

Amy and I have been watching (and loving) the Sharpe videos starring Sean Bean as Richard Sharpe, a British soldier fighting in the Napoleonic Wars.

One of the best parts of the series is the music. Much of the music is composed and sung by Rifleman Dan Hagman, played by British folk singer John Tams. Tams' voice is amazing and the Napoleonic-era folk songs in the videos are wonderful. A song I particularly liked hearing was "The Spanish Merchant's Daughter" (sometimes called "No, John, No"). It's a bawdy song and I found it charming--so charming that I decided to try my hand at writing my own. What follows is what I came up with.

Imagine it being sung back and forth like "There's a Hole in the Bucket". I'll try to record this one later, too.

p.s. It's not really all that bawdy, but sing it to the tune of Tantum Ergo if you long for the thrill of scandal...

Amy, Will You Let Me?

Robert: See that girl there? Her name’s Amy—
She looks nice in panty hose.
I would like to have a look-see
Just how high them hoses goes.

Oh, Amy will you let me
see how high them hoses goes?

Amy: Yes, my Love, on one provision—
You must do just what I say.
Robert: But of course, dear. What’s my mission?
Amy: Wait until our wedding day.

Oh, Robert, patient Robert,
Wait until our wedding day.

Robert: Surely, Love you must be teasing—
what an unkind thing to speak!
Can you not just once appease me?
I will marry you next week.

Oh, Amy, will you let me?
I will marry you next week.

Amy: Since, my Love, you asked so sweetly,
You can see how high they go.
I’ll remove my hose completely--
Put them on and you will know!

Oh, Robert, patient Robert
Put them on and you will know.

Jackie Moon Old Spice Commercials *All 8*

Ridiculously funny.

Volunteer Children

This woman must be a lost relative of mine.

Mancold

This is pretty funny.